First Law. Every measure the government takes can be explained by a combination of theft, gratuitous malice and dilettantism. There are no exceptions. If you can't tell which, bet on theft.
Second Law. Fidesz always announces the disgraceful acts they plan in advance. All you have to do is read the signs. Think of the most disgraceful act conceivable, double it - and you will still be stunned.
Third Law. In Fidesz-speak, terms like 'the people', 'citizens', ' Hungarians' always refer to Viktor Orbán. Fidesz's political messages only make sense when you substitute the right words.
Fourth Law. What you see is not rock bottom. There is always another rock bottom ahead and it goes much deeper. Always.
Fifth Law (the Law of Omerta). The three pillars of Fidesz governance are the Bolshevik-style exercise of power, Mafia-style conduct of business and incompetent public administration. Once you’re in, there is no way to quit. If you try, they will 'take care' of you. You will not make it even if you pretend to be a retard. Or maybe you will, since they are retarded, too.
Sixth Law. If they say they want to protect it, it means they want a protection racket. If you don't pay, they will destroy what they say they want to protect. Familiar, isn't it?
Seventh Law. There is no such thing as a win-win situation. They want to win and they want you to lose. You can buy yourself time by bribing them but they will come back for whatever they left behind last time.
Eighth Law. They don't play by the rules and they don't keep their word, agreements or the laws. If you think you are safe because you made a smart deal with them, odds are that you are an idiot. They have ripped off everybody so far and you won't be the first exception.
